Does anyone know what this means? Really? Can someone give me an example on how it's worked in their life? I mean in everyday life, not in times when nothing is within your control. I know all about that. I could rely on God when I had cancer, but here, now, when yes I do have difficulties, it's so difficult to know how that applies. Having cancer forced me into trusting and relying completely on God, but I realised today that I'm trying so hard to do all I have to do myself as if it all relies on me. Like my family and friends coming to know God and me dealing with the things I struggle with. It's so difficult to remember that it all comes from God and we are not the responsible party. We're only tools. Of course, I don't mean that we are not important to God. Of course we are! He sent His son to die for us. But in things like the salvation of others, we are only tools. God does everything else. And it's like I said about sharing the gospel with a friend of mine, then as in all other times, if our words make any impact at all, it is the Spirit working through us - so it all always comes down to God.
I am so sick of worrying about how to be holy and getting there immediately. In this world where everything is instant and you can have what you want when you want it, it is hard to take in that holiness in us is a work in progress that'll take our whole lives. Plus, when I see a problem, I just want to fix it immediately. But I can't. I'm a work in progress. God needs time to work in me and I need time to feel the benefits of all the things that I'm learning and what He's doing in me. But it's so disheartening to know that really once one thing is 'fixed', there'll be a hundred other issues.
And here is the oldest of my issues - trusting God about my spouse. Trusting Him regardless of there being one or not. Trusting that God will work in me to be the wife I am supposed to be. And trusting Him to be my comfort when there is no spouse for me. My mum is praying for my spouse. When she was challenged to pray for mine and brother's future spouses, she felt God told her, "A Hannah for James and a Joseph for Steph". Hannah and Joseph refer to the characters in the Bible, not literally named Hannah and Joseph. :) Ah well... My brother has found a really lovely wife. I'm proud to have her as a sister-in-law. I am just so used to being single now that I can't believe that there might be a guy for me. Who knows? I don't know why it has to be such a big issue. It just frustrates me since there are more important things to worry about.
Anyway, this was only supposed to be about how difficult it is to rely on God's strength to get through everyday things. I think I made my point. :)
3 comments:
i can relate to just about all that you've written about ...i guess God uses my weaknesses and sensitivity on a daily basis which I struggle with to show me that I depend on Him, in all the big things and little things-which means to pray continuously or try to be praying just going about the day about the big and little things (also speaking from experience of having had some huge trials where literally was forced to depend on God)...in daily life, I guess it's a choice, it's a choice to recognise that we don't have the wisdom, strength, etc, we need day to day even if we think we do...but that He does, and that's Relationship...that it can be good to be weak and when we think we're strong to choose to humble ourselves and ask God to show us what we need in Him.
Can totally relate to what you're saying about family and friends salvation too! God told me last year through someone I needed to cease from striving about it...that I should let go and trust Him ...just like when the disciples where in the storm....that He is in control and prayer should be of faith and not of fear for their salvation but faith that God desires this so much more than us...i was taking the responsibility upon my shoulders, but how small are my shoulders to bear a load like that...roll it back onto the Lord.
I heard an analogy the other day of a preacher who has a little girl about 4 yrs old who likes to help him set their log fire...he would do it so much better himself without her, but it's the relationship that he loves her and loves her being involved...she tries to 'help him' by blowing on the wood to kindle the fire, but her attempts are really rubbish honestly but behind her he is blowing quietly and kindles the fire, till it blazes...she thinks it was her...a bit like our Great Father getting behind us and completing the work that HE started.
as to the last bit...that's got me in a muddle too but God is saying that I should find my worth in Him...and I guess that also helps with trusting that HE loves us and will look after the future whatever that may be!
Thank you so much for your comment. It is exactly what I needed to here. Thanks for taking the time to write it. :)
:-)
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