I don't know if this is the same with you, but sometimes I feel things so strongly that I feel like I'm going to burst. Right now, what I feel is really, really happy for Rosie and Dave. I spent about half an hour on facebook chatting to Dave about his ups and downs with Rosie and I felt in me every sympathy pang I could and then I was so happy about the end that I actually nearly burst out crying!! 

Dave is one of the loveliest men I know - unfortunately, I only know a few, but Dave is definitely one of them. I remember Dave when I first met him and he was so quiet and he seemed to not have any confidence at all, but the last couple of years at uni, he really came out of his shell and - I don't know if you can use this term with a man, but he - blossomed. I feel so sad that I missed out on it because I was part of his quiet life. At least, I'd like to think I was... Haha! I remember hearing of the Rosie and Dave saga and feeling so sorry that Rosie didn't seem to feel what she should for him. But then, you can't force these things on people. Hah!

Anyway... It's all good now. And I'm really happy for them. But if I'm really honest, I'm happy for Dave most of all. Not just because Rosie's lovely, but because he got what he deserved. After all that heartache, there was such a blessing for him and it took years and years of it! I'm so happy that he's finally happy and I wish them both a long and happy future. :)

The other thing is somewhat selfish: I'm happy that I'm happy for them. Genuinely so because it moves me to tears that they're together. It means I can start to love again after all. I thought I'd lost the capacity to genuinely care for people other than my mum, brother, Marjo, Mim, Jonathan, Pete and Katherine. But my heart's open to Rosie and Dave too. And I hope it'll open up more and more so that I can be the loving, caring Steph I used to be. That'll be nice.

This whole thing has given me hope - hope that I can get back to the way I was, but also hope that maybe I'll be able to find happiness like Dave did. :) Sometimes years of heartache pay off after all. Here's hoping!!